Cowgirlin' It Up

    I had paid our horse show entries a month in advance, before Autumn was lame.  Now, not only was my horse lame but so were our big show plans.  This unexpected change in plans had me bummed out until my friend Gwen suggested that I show Autumn in the halter and showmanship events.  In these events you walk beside your horse and literaly just show them off.  Autumn was happy and comfortable enough to dazzle a crowd.  I called up the show secretary, changed our events and then went on to figure out what we had to do in these events.  What was I supposed to wear?  Did Autumn need her hair done?  Did I need a fancy halter and lead line?  Are there rules or do you just work it full frontal fashion style?  I proceeded to bug the living crap out of Gwen asking a million questions.  Luckily, for Gwen, the judge was holding a showmanship clinic the day before the show.  I signed up and saved the rest of my questions for the clinic.  
     I went to the clinic that Saturday morning and watched the participants practice specific patterns.  In these patterns one was asked to walk, turn, back up and then they had to make their horse stand square as a table to allow the judge to inspect them.  The handler had to scuffle out of the way of the judge's view of their horse, who was supposed to be standing statue still.  My friend Carolyn, let me practice with her 2 year old filly Rosie, who was already a pro at showmanship.  She was a very patient teacher although I caught Rosie rolling her eyes at me few times. 
    I learned some very important pointers that day which would increase my chances at winning a ribbon.  While leading Autumn in the pattern, I was to walk with my boobs out, butt tucked in as I held my arms out as if I were holding a silver serving platter.  I was to keep my eyes on the judge while shining a toothy alligator smile.  I can't remember them saying it but I think that you were aloud to breath if you could remember to do so.  As for the dress code...I needed to go get me one of them that there fancy new cowgirl hats, to accompany my blue jeans, Western shirt and cowgirl boots. 
    I left the clinic swirling with what I needed to practice with Autumn.  I had to give her time to get desensitized to me walking around with my boobs pushed out.  On the way home I swung by the tack store in search of a cowgirl hat.  One of the trainers at the clinic said that the "taco" shaped cowgirl hat was "in".  I tried on some real pretty hats and dropped them like they were hot when I saw their price tags.  I found a pile of hats stacked on the floor in the corner under a chair, picked one up, looked at the price tag... "$14.00".  Perfect!  I got the best fitting hat that didn't fit and headed to the ranch.
     Back at the ranch, I practiced America's Best Top Model with Autumn.  Despite Autumn being mesmerized by my bimbo zombie walk, she did all of the exercises perfectly and without any discomfort.  After practice I trimmed her whiskers, gave her a bath, packed up all that we needed for the show and gave her a kiss goodnight.
     With Autumn's mane and tail braided, Cindy drove us to the show early that next morning.  We arrived to find our friend Paul waiting, who turned out to be our impromptu groom.  Gwen came over to us and gave us a few last minute pointers.  Before I knew it, it was show time!



I think I lost points here because of my lack of busty-ness



    We did pretty well, that is Autumn did great but, I think I was the one losing points.  Walking around like a fancy lady just isn't my speciality.  We won 1st in one class, got 2nd in another and then I think we finished last in a few. 

At this particular horse show, I found out ahead of time that they do not award ribbons!  Instead you earn points which you can use for a prize.  I was shocked.  Who would want to go to a horse show and not want to win a ribbon?  Apparently, everyone.  According to the organizer of the show ribbons are a thing of the past.  But my friends at the show, not wanting to let me down, dug up a wrinkly showmanship blue ribbon from a bygone horse show and awarded it to our 1st place win!  They said they didn't have time to iron it but I loved it!  I loved that in the middle of getting a million things ready for the show they made enough time to dig around in bags of old ribbons to find it for me.

   It may be wrinkled but it is a treasured 1st place blue ribbon. 

    The horse show was great.  It was not only great because we won a ribbon but it was great because of all my great friends that didn't want to see me unhappy.  They got me to cowgirl it up.  They supported me by giving me another new thing to learn with Autumn.  They lent me a horse to practice with and lead lines.  They taught me how make leading your horse extremely complicated but all the while making it look effortless.  They drove me at the crack of dawn to the show.  They groomed my horse while I shoved a million bobby pins in my hair.  They took photos and videos.  They rummaged around for the perfect wrinkly blue ribbon to make my day.  They gave me advice for picking out the new rage in cowgirl hats...the  "taco" look.  They gave me pointers for the next show.   They gave me more great memories and showed me how lucky I am to have such great people like them in my life.  And of course there was Autumn.  She's always there to give her all to make me happy and share in a new adventure together. 

Thanks for reading!  Thank you to all the readers and their well wishes for Autumn.  Your advice, encouraging words and concerns brought me a lot of comfort, hope and good leads to research her lameness.  It really meant a lot to me.  Thank You!

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Copyright (c) 2012 Jacksonhillhorseygirl.com September 19, 2012