High Horse

A few years ago, we got a call at the veterinary office from a client out in the hills east of us.  Her horse was staggering around the pasture and she wanted the doctor to make the hour long drive out to her property as soon as possible. 
It was late noon before the doctor made it back to the office.  She said that the horse was walking as if it were drunk, totally uncoordinated and very fatigued.  The horse did not have a fever, heart rate was fine, hydration was fine.  The strange symptoms started adding up to the possibility that this horse could be suffering from some sort of neurological disorder.  Neurological disorders in horses are just about as great as they are in humans.  The treatment is long, costly and although there can be substantial improvement after the treatment, full recovery is not guaranteed.  The doctor reviewed all the different lab work available to test the blood samples she had taken from her patient.  With it being so late in the day we were unable to catch the overnight courier. The lab work would have to wait until the following day to be sent out. 
In the meantime, the doctor pulled out medical books, comparing symptoms and scenarios.  Before leaving for the day, the doctor called the client for an update.  The client said that another horse out in the same pasture was now displaying the same symptoms. The two of them were just swaying and swaggering their way around the field nibbling here and there at the grass. 
The next morning I got myself busy filling out the lab work forms and packaging up the blood work.  As the doctor was sitting down to call the client for an update the client called us.  The office came to a stand still and we listened to what we could of the conversation.  The doctor's face went from stone cold serious, to an eyebrow lifting wonderment, to a smile and then beat red.  There was a lot of laughing and "yes-ing" and it ended in "well that's good".
"Well?" we all asked when she hung up.
The doctor explained that the owner decided to walk the perimeter of their 40 acre pasture when she happened upon a huge heap of clippings that someone had dumped over their fence.  On closer inspection, the owner realized that this was not your typical landscape clippings.  This was some of Humboldt County's special green grass trimmings.  These horses weren't stumbling as much as they were tripping. Their diagnosis was eating weeds and getting a little dopey. 


This grass is like, so good man! You like, really got to try a bite! Wow!  It's like so green.

After this whole situation we decided that we may have to create a new type of exam to deal with these types of symptoms in the future. The exam would have to include:

1. Checking the eyes for redness
2. Playing live Grateful Dead music to observe if the horse does the hippie shuffle dance and likes the 45 minute guitar solo.
3. Offering the horse a tub of Ben & Jerry's ice cream to observe if he eats it all without sharing.
4. Seeing if the horse will engage in a game of hacky sack.
5. Seeing if the horse would like to jump on a trampoline.

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Copyright (c) 2012 Jacksonhillhorseygirl.com

P.T.S.D. Goat

"I'm going to need the veterinarian to come out right away!  Our goat was attacked by a bear and he's hiding under the deck shaking and won't come out." 
Ugh...a bear attack...never good.  "Is he bleeding?" I asked.
"I don't know, I can't see." a frantic voice replied.
"Okay, I'll send the doctor out right away.  In the meantime, you are going to have to get the goat out from under your deck for the doctor to be of any help."
"Okay. Okay."
I filled the doctor in on the appointment and the doctor rushed around the office grabbing suture and bandage material.  It was only a mater of minutes after I received the phone call that the doctor was on her way. 
Meanwhile, I got busy changing appointment times in order to give the doctor plenty of time to put the goat back together again.  When I had the schedule all reorganized the doctor came driving in.  Not good I thought.  Poor goat probably had to be euthanized it was so bad. 
The doctor walked in and I winced when I asked her how it went. 
"Well, the goat's fine, not a scratch on it."
"Really?"
"It turns out, that the dogs of the goat owner, were going nuts out in their yard which caused them to go outside to see what was wrong.  A big black bear was in their yard just sitting on top of their goat!  Just sitting on it!"

I wonder how many goats could fit under that ba-dunk-a-dunk?

The veterinarian went on to say that the owners made some sort of ruckus and chased the bear off.  Freed from the grizzly prison of buns of steel, the liberated goat B-lined it back to the house hiding itself under the deck.  There wasn't a single ding on him.  The poor little guy was just traumatized.  The veterinarian gave him a little sedative to help him relax but that's about all she could do to calm his little nerves. 
We called a few days later to check in.  He was doing well but still not himself.  Unfortunately, there aren't any self help groups for goats like him to talk out his terrifying experience and to know, that he is not alone.

Okay.  Who wants to share first?  Come on.  We're all here for the same reason.  No one is going to judge you. 
How about you?  Sitting all alone.  What's your story?

Thanks for reading!  If you would like to be added to my mailing list please email me at Jacksonhillhorseygirl@gmail.com.

Copyright (c) 2012 Jacksonhillhorseygirl.com  

Save Your Nipples...

Humboldt County may be well know for it's "green grass", and big logs but it also has a thriving dairy industry.  In the latter part of the 19th century Swiss-Italian and Portuguese immigrants came to work and to start their own dairies throughout Humboldt county.  Today the Portuguese still dominate the dairy business up here. 
I've watched the TV shows "Dirty Jobs" and "World's Toughest Jobs" and I vote that dairymen should win first place for both of those shows.  I don't need to tell you why I vote it the world's dirtiest job but in case you need me tell you it's full on non stop crap.  Getting crapped on directly from the source, stepping in it, shoveling it, wearing it, spreading it...  I vote it the toughest job because you do NOT get a day off.  Those girls need to be milked twice a day and they are on a schedule.  There are no sick days, no vacation days, no personal days, no I'm too hung over to get out of bed days, no it's too cold/rainy/hot/snowy to go to work days...You get no days off.  Period.  When those guys aren't milking they are scraping up poop, feeding, watering, tending to sick animals, fixing fences, fixing machinery,  planting hay, irrigating pastures, cutting hay, baling hay, storing hay, breeding animals, calving, selling animals, watching the milk market prices, selling their milk... At some point they must fall over and sleep a few hours before they have to get up in the dark of the morning and do it all over again.  All that work so we can have some extra whip on our mochas in the morning. 
Last week, one of our hard working Portuguese dairy farmers stopped by the veterinary office to pick up a few things.  He's a lovable guy, still hard working into his early 80's.  He loves to come into the office and charm all of us "beautiful senoritas" in his thick-as-pee-soup accent (which usually takes me about a minute of lag time to figure out what he just said).   Well, on this visit another good client and friend of mine was in chatting about her horse.  She had met this diary farmer a few weeks earlier when he walked off with one of her calenders she had for sale for Christmas.  He proceeded to tell her that he gave her calender to his brother-in-law in southern California.  He explained that he had horses down there that pulled wagons and not only that but he sucked on his mother.  Okay, so my minute of lag time was up and I still didn't know what he was talking about.  He was looking at us like "You know!  Sucking on his mother."  
I was now totally lost in the wilderness of translation and I gave him my best obvious puzzled look and my friend nodded at me. 
"Sucking on her nipples!" He said.
My friend's face was candy apple red. 
"He's a momma's boy?" I asked.
"Yes!  Momma's boy!"
We all laughed relieved this conversation made some awkward sense and was over...we thought.
He paid his bill and was getting ready to leave when he shook his finger at my friend, looked her straight in the eyes and said, "You save your nipples for some one good!  You understand?" 
She nodded.
He said something else as he walked out the door and my friend, who's nerves seemed a bit frayed at this point, yelled "What did he say?" 
After I had my minute of lag time I realized he said "Have a beautiful year." 

Don't let anyone take advantage of yours!

 It's not everyday, or really any day for that matter, that you get such serious advise concerning your nipples.  I began to think about this topic after he left and it all started to make sense when I began to think about his job.  Talking about nipples, for him, is like someone talking about using their computer or cash register at work.  He has spent his whole life yanking on nipples to make a living. Talking about nipples is just shop talk for him.  But you know?  He's right.  Don't just give yours away especially to someone who is not good.
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Copyright (c) 2012 Jacksonhillhorseygirl.com

Someday...

The boat sinks and in the chaotic struggle to stay alive in the water a young boy grabs hold of a rope attached to a horse that is swimming past him.  The horse tows him to a deserted island where overtime they form a bond and the horse allows him to ride with nothing more then their love and friendship guiding each other.  That was the opening to the Black Stallion book series.  That is exactly when I knew that someday I would like to have that same relationship with my dream horse.  I would ride my horse free of saddles, bits and reins.  Our friendship and love would carry us on our adventures. 
Years passed, practicalities set in from life's lessons learned and I sort of forgot about that childhood fantasy until one day when this YouTube video got sent to my email.

Stacy Westfall riding Wizard's Baby Doll bridle-less and bareback.  Get some tissues.



If you just watched the above video and you're like me every time I watch it, you're choked up.  This video brought back my Black Stallion dreams. This video is proof of what can be done.   I decided that it was time to get my head out of the clouds and to climb up on  my black stallion...well...my chestnut Belgian draft filly that is.  I started teaching Autumn verbal cues which matched with rein and leg cues with her bridle & saddle on.  I've been doing this inconsistently for a while now and not really thinking we've made much progress.  Work clogs my week and when the weekend hits the thought of training in the arena sends me out lallygagging on the beach or trails.  So I've been slacking a bit on my dream to reality making. 

The other morning, I got Autumn from the pasture, gave her breakfast and decided to just sort of play with her loose in the arena.  She followed me around little obstacles, trotted after me and when I climbed to the highest step of the mounting block she cozyed herself right against it.  How could I say no?  I slid on to my fuzzy, chestnut colored best friend who was free of ropes, halters, saddles...everything but me. We sat still for a bit and then I gave her a squeeze.  She walked a few strides and I asked her to stop by sitting deep and exhaling.  The smart girl that she is came to a stop.  We did that a few times and she nailed it each time.  She was heading to the gate and I thought this is going to be the true test.  Will she turn away from the barn?  I turned my body, used my legs to guide her and she did it!  She knew what I was asking her and she did it!!!!!  Wow! We practiced a few more turns and circles and she did them all.  It wasn't pretty and we almost walked into the hillside bank but we did it.  It was a glimmer in to a realm of making my dream come to life. 

Someday....This...

Plus this... 

with practice...

will hopefully equal this.

Someday this will be Autumn & I except it will be her and I won't be an adolescent boy.

That short ride has ignited the fire in me to work harder at this.  Maybe someday I'll have a video to post of us that isn't totally embarrassing and doesn't have an ambulance driving away as it's closing scene.  Our boat full of doubtfulness has sunk and I'm holding on to the rope of my chestnut filly carrying me into my dreams.

Thanks for reading!  If you would like to be added to my mailing list, please email me at Jacksonhillhorseygirl@gmail.com

Copyright (c) 2012 Jacksonhillhorseygirl.com